ever since i was a little girl we have had a bowl of chips and french onion dip at each and every family party. it’s just never not there. it’s a staple. and fucking good and made simply with dried onion soup mix and a tub of sour cream. i hate sour cream i hate all white creamy foods for that matter like ranch dressing and cream cheese and mayonnaise especially mayonnaise and isn’t mayonnaise such a fancy word for such an unfancy food? without fail when i mention my disdain for white and creamy substances there is usually a chuckle because this combination of words seems to always remind people of sperm. i do like sperm, usually. i don’t like the chunky or grainy kind and my ex boyfriend’s because his cum tasted like whiskey. and sometimes when i’m down there and overthink it i can’t swallow it and i don’t like to transfer it from mouth to mouth maybe because there is spit involved and that takes it to a different level. but usually i like it just fine. for some reason the sour cream part of the dip which by the way is ninety five percent of the content doesn’t bother me. unless again, i overthink it. so i try and clear my mind while eating as to not spoil the mood taste or moment. i think i do the same thing with the cum and it’s weird to think that i apply that same practice while giving head. but you know, whatever works.